The Value of Building Connections to Increase Your Social Currency
Have you ever felt stuck, unchallenged, and ready to make larger leaps in your career, but felt like you just kept coming up with reasons for why you’re not “ready”?
There is a saying that your net worth is directly aligned with your network. Not feeling “ready” is really the surface level our subconscious tells us to keep us safe. From stepping into possibilities. From earning the money we desire, but know is outside our comfort zone. From stepping into greater opportunities that scare us a bit because they force us to stretch and grow.
Did you know that 85% of senior roles filled at major corporations are filled by prior or developed relationships? Strategic relationships matter. Building relationships in your industry and complementary industries are what helps top-performing corporate women go from being unseen and underpaid to seen for opportunities that earn them $100,000+ more in compensation.
It’s no longer just “leveraging your network” that helps women land amazing job opportunities. It’s about building key relationships with decision-makers at dream companies. It’s intentionally putting yourself in rooms where people are new mentors that can help you 10X your career overnight.
Recruiters are trained to prioritize referrals over cold applications coming in the door. It’s credibility. It’s someone with influence vouching for you and establishing trust.
Many top-performing women in the tech industry won’t get seen for opportunities simply because they are not tapping into social currency. The “hidden job market” I like to call it.
What ultimately stops women from developing relationships outside of their comfort zone?
If you ever experienced self-doubt, not feeling “enough”, imposter syndrome, and fear–these are some of the ones my clients often face before working with me:
Why would they care about talking to me?
I don’t have enough experience.
What if I fail?
What if I’m seen as a fraud?
I can’t offer any value.
80% of our thoughts each day are negative. We have about 50,000 thoughts a day. So, it would be normal for us to think about the negative outcomes over the possibilities first. However, we need to manage those thoughts more intentionally so we can allow ourselves to consciously build more awareness and develop healthier habits that can impact our behaviors and career.
When we combine healthier mindset tools and a strategic process that allows us to consistently communicate with new contacts every week (this is where it becomes fun and can change your career options drastically).
Les Brown said it perfectly, “you can argue your limitations for as long as you want to keep them.”
What limitations do you need to release? What story do you keep saying subconsciously that isn't serving you anymore at this stage?
What are the mindset shifts we need to feel empowered to take action in our careers?
One step you can take is to reframe your situation. For example, when we feel “stuck” or not “ready” to take action, we need to start by asking ourselves better questions. Ask yourself:
What options are you weighing?
What decisions are you delaying?
What does your intuition tell you?
Stay curious with yourself and ask better questions on why you don’t feel ready. What is really causing the hesitation? Are your worries fears or facts?
We want to make important decisions from facts, not fear. It’s ok to honor those fears, but we must start dealing with the facts first. For example:
Fear-based thinking: If I reach out to a SVP at my dream company, they won’t respond or want to talk to me.
Fact-based thinking (and more helpful): They are busy running an entire organization at a well-respected company. Their decision to respond to my initial email or LinkedIn message doesn’t define the possibilities I can tap into with utilizing a wider network.
Getting into a community is critical, especially for women entering their 30s.
We are not meant to do this life and career alone. People want to help you and see you succeed.
Often my clients have worked very hard for where they are in their career and believe they need to “struggle” to deserve the rewards they want to see in their career.
Do not suffer in silence. Getting outside help, having champions who want to see you succeed, and getting in community with other women who understand the exact stage you are in with your career are necessary vehicles for expansion.
In order to truly have the impact on other women, especially on women of color, we have to start working on ourselves and career first. We can’t pour from an empty cup.
My ask to you is to look at who you want to be in one year from today. Write out everything about your dream job as if it’s already happened.
Now, look at the decisions that need to be made in order to get in alignment with manifesting those goals.
Who do you need to be to make that dream opportunity happen?
What decisions must you make today to change the outlook for next year?
In order to build your network successfully and authentically, it starts from developing a deeper purpose.
About the Author
Marisella Bodrero is the CEO of Accelerator, an elite coaching experience that helps top-performing women in tech who are currently underpaid, advance into strategic roles by claiming their value while increasing their base pay using LinkedIn outreach. Connect with her here.